I am growing older but not up....

well today must have been "let's change the blog" day. well guess what? i will conform with these actions, i may have gotten a blog to fit in, but damn it i will change for anyone...plus i dont know how and i dont have the time. plus lately i realize i hate this blog, no one reads this. i mean honestly, i am kidding myself. I should just start spouting off offending comments and see if anyone cares a'tall. that might get some readers. lol. i am just not fun and interesting like anyone else, so its sad. i will continue to update my boring life and all but damn, i should just save the trouble.

I have been listening to alot of JImmy Buffet lately and he really brings things into perspective. Makes you feel very fornunate in life and never makes you feel down. With things coming to an end here at school it just makes me realize how much i just want to hold on to the memories and cherish what lil time i have left. so it'll be good. i am super excited for band contest tomorrrow night, we are gunna get kick ass and go to state. that would be awesome, but if we dont get to go to state it wont be because we didn';t get good scores, it will be because other bands got better scores then us, thats all. so whatever happens, happens, but this is like the last time i will play concert type music for the rest of my life, its weird, a realization i haven't come to terms with. i heart music so much, i need to figure out how to keep going.

i gotta go, bed time. love you all. you are very special. god speed! til next time...

..."i'd rather die while i am living, than live while i am dead."

what a waste

an innocent nap turned into a big waste of money. my piercing is no longer, my tongue healed in a matter of 5 hours. it baffles me but i guess it is the fastest healing part of the body. its just like, damn, ony three months and i blow it.(figuratively speaking..lol) i found it to be a hassle and unneccessary most of the time, but a part of me really liked it. oh well i guess this opens the door to other piercings, but nothing too extreme i am not a hardcore girl or anything. the thing that gets me is that i took it out so i could speak for senior speaker auditions today and i forgot to put it back in. and i probably wont even get the gig, and i lost the piercing, so i went out with less than what i had, and they said i had nothing to loose. lol. oh well. that chapter is closed, which one should i open now? let me know. but i gotta go, bed time! lata playas. til next time...

...take care of your body before you abuse it!

jose looks chinese

oh this is a day the lord has made, amen. how yall feeling tonight!? whoo. I did alot today, here is the quick run down. I went to breakfast at the golden egg with beccy and cat, then i went and opened a checking account at TCU, then i went and got my nails done by jose who is from asia, and then i went to kmart to put in some time off, then i went home worked on my speech and cleaned my bathroom, and then i went to my dad's and ate taco bell, then i back to my mom's house to finish the speech, (condensed version) in the end of a two hour long goose chase i have a new printer and usb cord and now i am chatting and touching up my god awful excuse for a speech. thats it. hasta. til next time...

...do you feel the love?

who needs pimp juice?

Hey yall! its finally the weekend. A slightly extended weekend due to the ECS emergency make days built into the school schedule. I have always been a fan of them, but i prefer them to be on fridays but i guess mondays alright too. I am not complaining i am just saying. With school winding down makes you think real hard about your future, or so i am told. I am having so much fun right now that the only thing i am thinking real hard about is where to go hang out at. You'd be crazy not to enjoy your last days of high school, but i do know some crazy people. lol. oh well.

My cd changer in my car has been deemed, unfixable, but i dont really have or want to spend the money to replace it, so i invested in my hardly used tape player. I bought Journey's Greatest Hits Live on tape for $2.99, and it is awesome. I love journey, how could you not!? I know lindsay appreciates them, and praised me for my purchase. thank you lindsay, you have never dissapointed me in the music department.

Last night we had ISSMA orchestra contest at Concord. Memorial's full orchestra went group 2 this year so we basically owned that competition. I totally sucked at the William Tell Overture, its like i forgot how to play all together, i felt really bad, i hope they dont notice, that would suck. Sightreading was alright but i can't read music very well, i never have been. Its one of the reasons i am not that good at music, i just can't quite grasp rythms and things by reading, i have to listen and then play. thats how i do things most of the time. Its no big deal though, i wont be playing muc h after graduation with makes me kind of sad. I mean, i might suck, but that doesn't mean i dont like to play. In facat i really love to play. So maybe i will play like piano or something and hire someone for lessons, cuz i dont think i could go completely without music, theres just no way.
We have contest for symphonic band next friday at Penn, this is what we are really working for. The contest is set up a lil different this year which could really help us or really hurt us. Its divided into two districts instead of like several. So the top half of the state is going to Penn and the bottom half goes somewhere else, so the top 8 from each site gets to go. So hopefully we wont screw it up, plus the scoring system is different as well. Instead of starting with a perfect score and deducting for mistakes, you start from zero and work your way up through your performance. I hope we do well, that would be awesome to be state qualifiers our senior year.
After contest i went with Beccy Cat and Ellyn to Cracker Barrel for dinner(they wanted hashbrown casserole) and i ate a chicken sandwich, then headed over to South Bend to movies 16 to see 13 going on 30, which was so cute. It made me laugh alot. I am usually not a fan of those kinds of movies but it really was worth seeing. I love how they depict the 80's. Then on the way home me and beccy heard the knock off version of MILKSHAKE, called HOTDOG. it was so funny, but disgusting, it was 12 so it is only played at night. Its a classic, i'll always remember that song.

LoL, i better get going, i have to get ready for a fun filled afternoon and evening of work. Yea. so have fun, stay safe, and god bless. til next time...

...hold on to the kid inside of you.

good things come to those who wait

Hey yall! Its here! My new computer, its so much faster than my old crappy one. I have never had a new computer before so this is awesome. I am so proud of my new powerful purchasing skills with my hardly earned savings account money. LoL.

this is gunna be extremely short cuz i have some HAMLET to read, but you are all beautiful. Take it easy, and go outside, its beautiful! til next time...

..dont loose sight of whats important. holla

In the flesh

Holla! its been awhile. Between me not having internet access and having a slightly businesser schedule than normal, blogging has been virtually impossible. I ma updating at school because this is the only place I can use the world wide web. No worries, my new computer and internet software is being sent to my house as we speak by the UPS man, so within no time i will be jumpin and jiving once more.

Time is really flying by, i mean, only 29 school days left til summer vacation. Granted i am not counting weekends or make up days but 29 seems like a good number. Orchestra contest is on friday @ concord, we suck. The orchestra is going group 2 so a first place is a sure thing. Also band contest is the next friday @ penn, we dont suck. This is the chance we have been waiting for to go to state, if we just get our shit together in the next two weeks, we should be alright. I am a little worried, and if we dont go it will be alright, and i know some would be relieved because its on the same day as prom, but i would really like to see this band go far this year. Whether we finish 16th or 1st at least we can call ourselves state qualifiers. Prom is only about three weeks away. To much relief I have a dress, hair appointment and a date. Nothing to write home about, but two friends just doing a favor. I am going with Lonnie, possibly, so the pressure of a date would be non-existent for the both of us, but if we get better offers we will take them instead of each other. Its more a deal of conveinance, so either way, i will have a date. Thats always good. It would totally suck if i didn't have a date...collin suggested i take Zack baier but i was like no chance in hell. That kid is so mean, and always putting me down. I would not want to go with the kid who lacks personality, it would ruin the night. We will see i guess, but i am not too terribly worried about it, i am not that syked to go to prom in the first place, i would just like go to the after parties with my friends...lol. oh well, hold on to the memories...haha. speaking of memories, here is the theme for the prom: "Tonight's Dreams, Tomorrow's Memories".....not the best theme ever. I think the prom my class put on last year was pretty stellar. The junior class this year used prom budget money to buy t-shirts that were like walking advertisements for prom. They served no purpose and only benefit the kids who get to keep the shirt. Plus they used 300 dollars of the money that they should be using for decorations. Whatever, thats what they want to do than so be it. I liked the theme that was italian for beautiful evening, but lets dream away. Prom 04! whoo hoo.

This is what high school really is, you get upset about the prom theme and the lack of ketchup in the cafeteria and the way the halls are crowded, this is a high school response, if you dont like it, dont hang around me. I am tired of people saying i am too big of a reflection of high school, well newsflash...i am in high schoool! i care about dance themes and commencement orders, get over it. That doesn't make me any less intelligent or any less enthusiastic about life and situations, it just makes me in high school. So please, lets approach this rationally, I am in high school; take it or leave it.

Duty calls, i must attend to my obligations with school now. Maybe something later but i dont know, we will just have to see. Talk to ya soon, til next time...

...dont operate any machinery after heavy drinking.

time drive by

Hey yall! I lied. I didn't blog about my stellar weekend. Ah well, i am sure you aren't that dissappointed. Its alright, I am sure it wouldn't have interested most of you anyway.

Lately it seems the world is at my fingertips. I have everything I always thought I would have, and yet I am still not happy. I am happy with my life definately but, I feel like its all coming to an end and thats what makes me unhappy. I am going through whats called, "pre-separation anxiety disorder" focusing on all the things I will be leaving and separating from aka Basically flipping out over change. I hope I am not the only one who feels like that, and I have a feeling I am not. I know many many people who have gone through this before me and they survived but, for me, right now it hurts. I am scared of everything coming to a hault. Change, its inevitable. And i always have this motto that change isn't bad, its just different and and different can bring a whole new world of good. Well, i was never one to take my own advice. LoL. This wednesday is our last band concert at EMHS for us seniors. I am excited but damn, it sucks. I have been playing with these kids since I was 10 years old, its just weird. We have contest in a few weeks and that will be great, we have a good chance of going to state but, this is the last time, i look out into the audience and see my grandma in tears because she loves to come and watch me play. In two months, i wont be playing anymore, and that hurts so bad. It hurts to think, that i wasted so much time goofing around in band when i could have been working really hard to make myself better. I realized it way to late, and although its great i am playing better and working harder this year, i am never gunna get that chance to really play. Its the choice I made, and its those choices that make me sad. I am syked for the end of the year and for commencement to commence, but I am totally freaked out about the next 6 months to come after. I am gunna have to start bracing myself.

Enough of the sob story. I am going to see BIG FISH at the dollar movie(which is now 2 bucks, figures). Bye yall! til next time...

....hang on to your philosophy!

Coming Soon....

Dont you want to know what the HOCA POCA BOCA is? Want to know why they call me the dollar bill girl? You want to know why I had a scary looking limp while roaming chicago? Can anyone really say "Galapagos?"correctly the first time? How about the reason why I haven't slept in three days?(until now)......well if you dont want answers then stop reading.
BUT........................................
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If you do want to know.........................................


Check me out tomorrow cause i am dirt ass tired! later, til next time....good things come to those who wait!